I was at an event recently where different people were invited to give a short speech about the guests of honor. During one of those speeches it was said of one of the guests, “He is kindest person I have ever met.” That one phrase stuck out over all the others over the evening.
“The kindest person I have ever met.”
We don’t seem to hear much about kindness anymore. People recognize it when it is there, but it is often lacking in today’s society. Go to the mall during Christmas time and see how people treat each other. There doesn’t seem to be much kindness being given out during the season of giving.
So what is this kindness I speak of? It is found in how we regard and interact with others. Kindness is genuine, and those who receive it recognize it as such. It goes far beyond being “nice” to someone. Kindness looks at the other person and makes the decision to value that person to the point of treating them with a gentleness, graciousness and respect. It is also denotes a goodness of heart. Kindness isn’t just a head thing – it is a heart thing.
In Paul’s first letter to the church in Corinth he addressed what Godly love was, and he began with this phrase:
Love is patient and kind. (1 Cor. 13:4)
Love is Patient
Patience has to do with handling a situation or circumstance. I can wait patiently for the traffic light to turn green. I can wait patiently for my daughter to come out to the car after the football game is over. My patience may involve my daughter, but it has to do with the situation I find myself involved in with her.
Love is Kind
Kindness has to do with the relating to one another. I can be kind while I am patient, as I can have a gracious attitude while I am waiting for the elevator. That attitude isn’t directed toward the elevator. I have no relationship with it.
I can have a gracious attitude toward my daughter as I patiently wait for her to come to the car after the game is over. My attitude toward my daughter making me wait is relational. I can be aggravated. I can be short and sharp with her in my speech once she gets to the car. I can also be gentle and gracious. I can do so by waiting to hear why she took so long before I go off on her for making me wait. I can practice letting the goodness that is in my heart by the Holy Spirit govern my thoughts and my words before either go into action.
That’s kindness. It goes beyond doing a good deed. It is that good deed done with a loving, caring heart. The kind heart motivates the person to listen, help, share, and even prefer another’s comfort over his own. A kind heart gives the last bowl of soup not just because it is the right thing to do. It gives that last bowl because it wants to bring comfort to the person it is being given to.
Which brings me back to the person who was honored as a “the kindest person I’ve ever met.” As I thought about that phrase, it made me think of all the other things that could’ve been said:
“He is the smartest person I know”
“He’s the most successful person I know”
“He’s the most well-spoken person I know”
Of those and so many more that could be said, he was the kindest person. What a wonderful thing to have said about you. Kindness is from the heart of God. It is God’s character resident in and actively moving through the heart of a person, touching another’s life in a way that makes them feel valued. In fact, this kindness is rendered as “gentleness” in Galatians 5:22, where Paul wrote of the fruit of the Spirit. I like to refer to them as the character traits of God. They are God’s character that His Spirit cultivates in our lives.
It was as if the person honoring that man was saying:
“Of all the people I’ve met in my life, you have shown me the most genuine respect and regard for me as a person that I’ve ever experienced. You’ve made me feel valued and important by your words and even more, your actions toward me. The way you relate to me has made quite an impression on my life, and I feel like I have worth because of it.”
Taking Inventory
Since that evening I’ve asked myself, “How kind do people find me to be?”
I’ve done some soul searching to find areas where my kindness gaps are. I found one yesterday morning driving to work. I’ve located a kindness fissure, working its way to a chasm. It has to do with people not paying attention when the traffic light changes. I have a route that appears to be filled with people putting on makeup or answering their morning text messages. I see the lane next to me clearing out while the cars in my lane sit. Static. No movement. Then as the light goes back to red we move way up, where the person 8 cars ahead has finally noticed they should have been moving their vehicle – not their mascara brush or fingers on the phone keyboard.
In this case – I need to find a place of patience with the situation, and a kind attitude toward the person causing it. I have some work to do.
Where is kindness in your life? Do you practice it in any form or fashion? Would anyone you know ever say you were a kind person? Kindness isn’t an optional trait in life if you walk with God. Let His Spirit work in you to cultivate a heart of kindness and compassion for those around you. You’ll find that people will respond to you in different ways, but as your show them kindness you are showing them a facet of the heart of God toward them. Your kindness can change hearts. It will also open doors that can change lives, and that is ultimately what we are all here for.
Be genuine and kind to someone today. And tomorrow. And the next day. Make it a lifestyle and change the world one person at a time.
